Cup of Nirvana Philosophical and Contemplative Explorations

Zen Sinking in the Ocean

Zen, and by this I mean,

your practice and your goal,

must sink in the ocean,

must drown in the vast sea

of dark unconsciousness,

from whence you shall emerge

reborn, not in another

body, space, or time,

but into the non-seeing,

non-feeling, non-thinking

that remains after the

dissolution of your mind.

 

1. In Zen, there’s no interest in extinguishing our desires. Quite the contrary, they’re given their rightful space, along with all thoughts, feelings, and sensations. Zazen [Zen meditation] is about the non-encroachment of mental material upon the Self. In Zazen all mental story-telling comes to an end. Mental material remains, but there’s no effort or interest in creating some kind of identity out of this material. This is the encroachment of the Self upon the mind. Here the mind has its voice, and it may speak very very loudly indeed! Yet at the same time, it’s equally true that the mind has been silenced. That silence is the Self. You are that.

2. In zazen I experience samsara – the cycle of death and rebirth, for I observe the emergence, development, and dissolution of one thought-form after another. And yet, while my essential emptiness is clearly seen, it’s simultaneously clearly seen that I am, and I am more than I could ever imagine myself to be. Therefore, I am utterly beyond all death and birth. We may choose to call this an “awakening” or “enlightenment,” but it’s really nothing special at all. 

3. In zazen one observes the rising and falling of thoughts, sensations, and feelings. One need not practice very long before noticing the gaps between the rising and falling of a particular thought, sensation, or feeling. Eventually one may fall into that gap and then one observes nothing at all, yet awareness persists. You are that awareness, and the gap is your essential emptiness.

4a. Speaking of being on “the outside” of one’s thoughts, feelings, or sensations is just a convenient way of speaking of observing them.  The importance of this is that in the observation process the “I” is distinguished or dissociated from mental material. To be on “the inside” of the thoughts is thus to have identified oneself with them, to simply *be* that thought, feeling, or sensation.  But you are not that, as the unqualified formless I is more fundamental than qualified I, the I qualified or limited by forms of thought, forms of feeling, and forms of sensation.

4b. Now it is a truism of the non-dual traditions in Hinduism and Buddhism, that we must simultaneously acknowledge that the Self both is and is not the body-mind.  When we look closely into experience we see that it is only the fact of awareness that is enduring, but the body-mind is not enduring.  Neither the body nor mental material in the form of thoughts, feelings, or sensations are enduring.  While these objects of awareness are temporary, awareness itself abides.  The Self as pure awareness is thus distinct from body-mind.  Nonetheless, the mental material arises from the Self and may in this sense be identified with it, as so many modes or manifestations of the Self.

4c.  This qualified identification of mental material with the Self is important in order to avoid introducing a separation between what I am essentially and how it is that what I am manifests.  The import of neti-neti (the Upanishadic “not this, not that”) is to free us from an uncritical or naive identification of Self with the mind-body and bring us back to the idea of the Self as the abiding presence of awareness.  But having done this, it is necessary to see that the thoughts, sensations, and feelings that do not exhaust or limit what I am nonetheless arise from and are part of the inexhaustible, unlimited reality that is the I.

5a.  The metaphor of the ocean and waves is therefore most frequently given to communicate the simultaneous identity and non-identity of the Absolute and the Relative, the One and the Many.  The wave is distinct from the ocean, but only as a temporary, limited, modulation or manifestation of a vaster, enduring reality.  But the wave is never without the ocean, and the ocean – inasmuch as it is alive with current, is never without waves.  The waves arise from, ride upon, and dissolve back into the ocean.  So also, all you think, feel, and sense comes out of you, rides upon you, and dissolves back into you.  This movement is at the heart of what we call “love.”

5b. Love therefore seeks no permanence other than Itself.  Personal love cannot endure because persons don’t endure. Indeed, “person” is just the name we give to what is a dynamically evolving dance between elusive “partners.”  One person loving another person is just a shared and often clumsy dance to a common song that plays for a time. Dance, and dance with passion. But know that your dance is born of the eternal Dancer, and your love, which abides only for a moment’s breath in eternity’s play, is born of the eternal Lover.

5c.  “You are not the same as me, but you have come from me, from a movement in the depths of my own being. You are here but for a time, and then you pass away.  But while you are present, you are from me and of me. And I love you with all the vastness of myself, regardless of the form you take. And when you pass away, whether in the light of a hot summer day or the darkness of a cold winter night, you dissolve into my love.” So said the ocean to the wave. So said I to my thoughts. 

6. Give your thoughts, even your most unpleasant thoughts, your deepest love, even as you give your love to a rebellious child.  Seek not to correct his ways, but only to embrace him, for you will thereby calm the otherwise unbearable current of fear that drives him.

The Sweetest Freedom

It’s been a month now since my blog “Chocolate Nirvana,” in which I provided some preliminary observations on the symbolic nature of what at the time was a temporary suspension of my nearly two-year sugar abstinence. As an introverted intuitive, I live deeply in the symbolic realm, and my involvement with “chocolate” has been a wonderful example of the dance between symbol and new life orientation.

 

Since the earlier blog, I have continued to eat dark chocolate once a week, and there’s been no “falling off the wagon” into an oblivion of pastries, candies, and other sweets to which I was addicted my whole life.  Apparently moderation is possible, and cravings can be engaged in ways I hadn’t considered under my earlier “black and white” thinking. Of course, perhaps I wasn’t ready for this path until now. As I said in the earlier blog, this is about the discovery of and commitment to boundaries shaped by spiritual practice and the resultant clarity about myself and the world, not to appease others or make them happy.  This is the “sweetest freedom,” but it reaches beyond chocolate to how we engage every aspect of life.

 

What follows are some spiritual contemplations that have evolved out of my new orientation. In a sense, the “sweetest freedom” is nothing more or less than life as it is, that is, life free from the mind’s filtering, story telling, and dualistic conceptual grid. It is a way of describing my coming into consciousness of this.  In Oneness everything is included, because aversion is simply another form of attachment. These contemplations touch on this sweetest freedom as manifested in love, karmic influences, truth-seeking, spiritual practice, and so-called “awakening.”
  
I’m not proposing any of this for “acceptance.”  The only objective is the cultivation of awareness:  simply be aware, aware of what arises in you, the reaction, whether positive or negative. There’s really nothing more to do with any of this.  It’s here only to be an occasion for bringing more illumination to what you already know.
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(1) Pick up the chocolate knowing you don’t need it. Take pleasure in the sight of it, the smell of it. Eat the chocolate tasting it. Take pleasure in the tasting of it, but taste it without expectation of anything further arising, remaining, or dissolving. When life becomes this “chocolate,” and you penetrate every activity and relationship with this same understanding, you’re tasting the sweetest freedom.
 
(2a) The liberation was truly experienced, but it was only temporarily experienced because it was rooted in aversion.
(2b) The love was truly experienced, but it was only temporarily experienced because it was rooted in aversion.
 

(3) When a woman so inspires me that I totally forget about her, I know that I’ve found a new, unique, and powerful form of love. And while this love naturally flows outward and is capable of tremendous enlargement and evolution, it’s sufficient that it fully and completely possesses itself. This is the “full cup” kind of love.

(4) She sleeps naked in the night. So near; yet so far. Her name is Truth.  I don’t obsess about penetrating her.  I simply surrender to the music playing in my head and quietly fall asleep. Truth immediately becomes my most faithful lover.
 
(5) Hold on to nothing, least of all yourself.
 
(6a) She wanted to trust him but her need to control him was greater. The gods granted her wish.  The gods made him co-dependent.  But Irony is the true ruler of the cosmos.  Her wish, once granted, made her unable to trust herself.  The gods laughed.
(6b) He asked the gods for the most precious, unique butterfly. The gods granted his wish. Alas, the man was soon destroyed by the hurricane generated by the butterfly’s wings.  A man in love with a butterfly is in the most vulnerable position because the gods know exactly what is necessary.
(6c) After blowing away her lover, the winds subsided and the butterfly started life again as a caterpillar. She longs for wings again. She longs for her freedom. Meanwhile, a man somewhere in the world asks the gods for a unique butterfly. The gods snicker.

(7) Whenever a woman turns me on to an amazing book, I know I’ve struck gold twice.  Whenever a woman turns me on to an amazing book, she turns me on. That’s the second nugget.  Here’s the jewel “beyond enlightenment” I find concealed in my hair.
 
(8) People don’t fear death as much as they fear silence. In fact, they fear death only because it’s the great inescapable and eternal silence.  If you would conquer the fear of death, regularly enter silence.  And in the silence, experience freedom as the other side of nothingness, the complete negation of yourself.
 
(9)You are what you are. Everything else is bullshit, bullshit I tell you, including so-called “enlightenment,” “spiritual practices,” and anything that is a substitute for what is the most naturally knowable and evident truth to each one of us. I don’t say, “have no practice.” I say realize your practice is already your present reality.  You’re already engaged in it.  Everything else is bullshit.
 
(10) The most difficult thing to grasp, indeed utterly ungraspable by the mind, is that student and teacher are non-separate, practice and goal are non-separate, delusion and awakening are non-separate, hell and heaven are non-separate, and you and your enemy are non-separate.
 
(11) Seek as one who wishes to find nothing. Practice as one who wishes to achieve nothing. And most fundamentally, love as one who wishes to receive nothing.
 
(12) A man took a shower after several hours of contemplating enlightenment. As he stepped out, only one thought occurred to him: ‘This was the best shower I’ve ever had.” In this moment he totally forgets about his search for enlightenment.  His search temporarily had ended with everything he was looking for. He then heard a toilet flush and resumed his search for enlightenment.
 
(13) The best part of waking up may simply be being aware of Folgers in your cup.

(14) Massage your thoughts with tenderness and they will retire into the stillness from which they arose.

(15) The Blue Jay squawking and screeching at my door is none other than my mind reminding me of its discontent.  Loving the Blue Jay is non-different from melting away my discontent, and loving the Blue Jay is non-different from loving myself as I appear as these unpleasant sensations and thoughts. Tenderness. That’s what’s needed.

(16) No one can complete you because you’re already complete, lacking absolutely nothing. All seeking, whether of persons, status, or material possessions, is rooted in ignorance of this fundamental truth: you’re already everything your mind is seeking.  There is no other freedom than that which is already your present reality.  This is inaccurately called Zen, but it’s really life as it already is for you, whatever your life may be.
 
(17) Folgers coffee falling as rain from the sky, turns to chocolate that drips down my lips. I taste it and let the taste go.  It leaves my lips with a kiss goodbye. The butterfly is free, and so am I.

 

Michael Sudduth

Note on Cup of Nirvana Blog

Dear Subscribers:

Since the subscriber list to Cup of Nirvana blog is growing, I thought I would offer a brief note on the content of future blogs.

As most of you are aware, I’m presently blogging on topics on eastern spirituality and philosophy and topics related to empirical arguments for life after death.  These are very different topical territories, and my writing style typically varies considerably between the two.  I realize that some subscribers are more interested in particular topics than others. While I will try to rotate topics and be balanced, this is not always possible. The terms of my contract with Palgrave Macmillan place certain constraints on the kind and amount of material I can presently share related to my book on life after death.  Nonetheless, I hope to post something on this in the coming weeks.  In the meantime, I will continue to post on topics in eastern philosophy and spirituality.

Enjoy!

Michael Sudduth

God – The Dream is Over

“I just believe in me…Yoko and me, and that’s reality…the dream is over. . .the dream is over, yesterday I was the dream weaver and now I’m reborn.” – John Lennon

For many years I disliked John Lennon’s song “God.”  Like so many other things in life, my dislike of this song was rooted in the threat its lyrics posed to my vision of the world.  It threatened to awaken me from my “dogmatic slumber.” Such a comfortable place, you know? But the dream has been slowly fading during the past few months.  I now understand this song. Lennon had the wonderful gift to describe awakening in a way that was simultaneously offensive and beautiful. I now see the beauty of it, the beauty of being stripped of all these surrogates of Self: heroes, teachers, philosophies, projects, careers, religions, relationships, and lovers.

In celebration of this, below I have altered Lennon’s lyrics to fit my own life and experience of waking up.  This is my personal confession of non-faith in things and people I once trusted and believed in, but life revealed them to be illusions of varying levels of sophistication that merely perpetuated my co-dependence and kept me from seeing life as it is.  Life is happening right now, right here. Don’t miss it because you’re “in love,” “in hate,” a character in someone else’s neurotic story, or otherwise exiled or unconscious.  Be exactly as you are. Find the natural joy and completeness that is already within you.

If you play the video above you can read my revision of the lyrics to Lennon’s original version of the song.  If “God” speaks to you, I invite readers to write their own version of this song.  It will prove quite painful but beautifully illuminating and liberating.

GOD – THE DREAM IS OVER

 

God is a Concept by which we measure our pain

I’ll say it again

God is a Concept by which we measure our pain

 

I don’t believe in Batman.

I don’t believe in Elvis.

I don’t believe in Messiah.

I don’t believe in Calvinism.

 

I don’t believe in Oxford.

I don’t believe in philosophy.

I don’t believe in Hare Krishnas.

I don’t believe in Survival.

 

I don’t believe in sugar.

I don’t believe in 12 Step.

I don’t believe in therapy.

I don’t believe in Carmel.

 

I don’t believe in goddess Shakti.

I don’t believe in Autumn.

I don’t even believe in Zen.

I just believe in me…

Aidan and Me

And that’s reality. . .

 

The dream is over.

What can I say?

The dream is over.

Yesterday I was the Dreamweaver.

But now I’m reborn.

 

I was the philosopher.

But now I’m Michael.

And so dear lovers,

You’ll just have to carry on.

The dream is over.

 

Truth is Dancing

 

“Truth is Dancing” is a series of contemplations on truth and love.  More specifically, these are contemplations on my experience of the reality that is truth and love.  Truth is the ultimate lover. These contemplations initially arose in me while drinking several cups of Earl Grey tea at the White Raven cafe in Felton, California on July 25, 2014. They concluded in my room at Jikoji Zen Center later in the evening the same day.  Although written from a largely Advaita/Zen non-dual perspective, I have at points incorporated dualistic aspects of religious devotion.
– Michael Sudduth
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Truth is dancing.  
Watch her move to the rhythm of your heart. 
Truth is singing.
Listen to her in your silence and hear your voice.
It walks upon the mountains and echoes in the valleys.
It falls from the sky and drowns in the sea.
 

The dharma is never really “conveyed.” It simply unfolds, and this unfolding takes the form of the teacher and student. Ultimately, there is no teacher to convey the dharma and no student to receive the dharma. What is happening here, in this moment when all else is forgotten, is simply truth dancing.


When the unthinkable happens and you’re utterly broken, know that truth has just kissed you and is inviting you to enter her.

It’s not so much that the truth is within you; it’s rather that there’s nothing really outside you.

When you begin the search for truth, know that she has already found you.

The sound of a crying baby disturbed my zazen. But this was illusion, for I came to see clearly that the crying baby was my zazen, and it was I who had thrown up the obstacle.

Truth is like a tiger. To tame her, give her all the space she needs.  Don’t try to contain the truth. Don’t even try to feed the truth with your own interest and ideas.  Let the truth contain you. Let her feed you. This is called “surrender.”  Surrender to the truth.
 
Sometimes truth appears as Krishna, sometimes as Jesus, sometimes as the Buddha, but if you’re really lucky you’ll see it as the dog laying in the shade, the teardrop rolling down your face, and the ground upon which you walk.
 
Truth is simultaneously a love maker and a heart breaker. Embrace all of her.
 
If you wish to know the truth, stop looking for it. It will find you and make you free.

If you see things separate from yourself, know that truth is always moving towards you.  Just empty yourself and she goes right into your heart.  If you don’t see things separate from yourself, there’s no distance between yourself and truth.  You are the truth.
 
If you step into shit, just be aware you have stepped into shit. To step into shit with awareness is actually to have stepped into truth.  The person who steps into shit unaware or who consciously steps aside to avoid the shit succeeds only in stepping away from the truth.  So if you wish to enter the truth, step into shit with absolute clarity.
 
It’s impossible to give truth because it’s impossible to receive truth, and it’s impossible to receive truth because no one is ever without it.

Truth is the masculine. Truth is the feminine. Truth is that which is beyond masculine and feminine.  Truth is Shiva-Shakti. Truth is Radha-Krishna. Truth is sat-chit-ananda (being-consciousness-bliss).

As I look back on my life, I see that God has always been my companion during the dark nights of this journey called “life,” for though lovers and gifts have come and gone, there has always been a song, and I’ve always found rest in music as a place I instinctively know to be “home.”  This is just another way of describing the ultimate truth. What is it that never leaves you?
 
In devotion to God, truth is the dance of two becoming one.  This oneness is the essential emptiness of the two, the essential emptiness of lover and beloved.  In Zen, devotion is just as present, not as two becoming one, but the dance of oneness as duality.  This is the essential emptiness of the one, such that it may become many.  

 

In Zen devotion is the one manifesting as the heart of everything.  This one is your breath, which becomes everything.  This one is your posture, which becomes everything. This one is your chant, which becomes everything. The one is the mudra, which becomes everything. This one is your bow, which becomes everything. This one is the wall before you, which becomes everything. Truth is dancing, and this dance is life as it is.

The sages say that ‘God is truth,’ but, then again, so is everything else.
 
Truth resists being adequately stated in propositions because propositions can’t dance.
 
Truth is a dancer,
Spinning you around, 
Tossing you aside,
Taking all your breath,
And at long last
When you think 
you’re about to die,
You fall blissfully 
into her tender arms.
Truth is a lover. 
Truth is a dancer.

 

Michael Sudduth

Survival and the Empirical World (Book Abstract)

The following is a revised short abstract of my book in progress, Survival and the Empirical World. – M.S.

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Most broadly stated, Survival and the Empirical World is a philosophical exploration of the empirical approach to postmortem survival, that is, the attempt to assess the prospects for the survival of consciousness or the self after physical death on the basis of observational data. According to this approach to survival, we can in principle arrive at rational judgments about the possibility, plausibility, or probability of survival based on features of the empirical world that may be discovered and analyzed using the kinds of methods employed in the investigation of the world and as paradigmatically represented by the empirical sciences.

I. Book Focus and Thesis 

In the present work, I aim to critically evaluate arguments offered in support of the contention, shared by many who believe in life after death, that there is empirical evidence that justifies belief in personal survival.  My exploration focuses on empirical arguments in the tradition of philosophers such as William James, C.D. Broad, C.J. Ducasse and H.H. Price.  These “classical” arguments for survival are based on a wide range of empirical data drawn from five kinds of ostensibly “paranormal” phenomena: out-of-body and near-death experiences, apparitional experiences, mediumship, and cases of the reincarnation type.  Many survivalists maintain that these phenomena (individually or jointly) provide good perhaps even compelling evidence for postmortem survival.  I argue that empirical survivalists have not adequately made their case for these claims. Empirical arguments for survival, as traditionally formulated by prominent philosophers and survival researchers during the past century, are unsuccessful at providing a robust justification for belief in survival.  In this way the present work aims to make a contribution to the philosophy of postmortem survival by examining fundamental issues in the logic of empirical survival arguments. 

II. Core Issues in the Empirical Survival Debate

The critical evaluation of empirical survival arguments has usually focused on two kinds of skeptical challenges: the prior probability challenge and the alternative explanation challenge.  According to the first, the survival hypothesis has a very low degree of initial credibility, so low that, even if the hypothesis has the explanatory virtues empirical survivalists attribute to it, the survival hypothesis would still not be justified.  According to the second, the relevant data may be at least equally explained by any number of non-survival hypotheses, so the survival hypothesis is not the best explanation of the data adduced in favor of survival.

Whereas skeptics argue that these challenges, individually or jointly, defeat the empirical case for survival, empirical survivalists argue that this is not the case. Not surprisingly, the bulk of the literature in favor of an empirical case for survival has tended to focus on responses to these standard criticisms.  Empirical survivalists routinely emphasize the alleged defects of various non-survival explanations of the relevant data. They also typically attempt to diffuse the prior probability challenge, either by arguing that considerations of prior probability are not relevant or that purported reasons for supposing that survival has a low prior probability are unsuccessful at establishing this. 

III.  Recalibrating the Empirical Survival Debate

My critique of empirical survival arguments calls for a significant recalibration of the core issues in the empirical survival debate.  While the prior probability and alternative explanation challenges raise salient issues, I maintain that the more fundamental issue concerns the generally unacknowledged role and status of auxiliary hypotheses in empirical inferences to survival.  By “auxiliary hypothesis” here I mean a hypothesis whose content adds something to the simple supposition of consciousness or a human person surviving death.  I therefore propose what I call the auxiliary hypothesis challenge. I argue that traditional issues in the empirical survival debate must constellate around problems essentially connected to the reliance on auxiliary hypotheses.  It’s here that we find the most formidable challenge to empirical survival arguments. Moreover, the traditional prior probability and alternative explanation challenges take on their most potent forms when viewed in the light of the closed-allied problems associated with the adoption of auxiliary hypotheses.

IV. The Auxiliary Hypothesis Challenge

According to the auxiliary hypothesis challenge, (i) the relevant data constitute evidence for survival only if we adopt a number of auxiliary hypotheses about what persons would be like if they were to survive death, but (ii) this auxiliary hypothesis requirement actually generates a defeater for survival arguments in all their current formulations.  The auxiliary hypothesis requirement itself is based on a common feature of empirical survival arguments, namely the contention that the survival hypothesis leads us to expect the relevant data.  All such predictive features of the hypothesis depend on more than the simple supposition that some human persons survive death.  It involves adopting a wide range of assumptions about what persons would be like if they were to survive death.  However, these auxiliary hypotheses are either unjustified or, if justifiable, can only be justified by very liberal principles of epistemic justification that would equally justify other kinds of auxiliary hypotheses that may be conjoined with non-survival hypotheses to lead us to expect the same body of data.

I maintain that the auxiliary hypothesis challenge poses a dilemma for the empirical survivalist, and I show the several ways in which this dilemma constitutes a defeater for empirical survival arguments.  More precisely, I show why the dilemma prevents us from justifiably concluding that the survival hypothesis has a favorable net plausibility, that is, that it is at least more probable than not.  I also show that it prevents us from justifiably concluding more modestly that the survival hypothesis has a favorable comparative probability, that is, that the survival hypothesis is, if not more probable than not, at least more probable than the nearest competitor.

Since it is widely held among survival researchers and parapsychologists that the empirical approach to survival offers grounds for belief in survival that are superior to religion as a source for belief in life after death, my skeptical conclusion undermines this contention and thereby serves as a defense of religiously-based belief in survival.  Neither parapsychology nor survival research has succeeded in offering a viable epistemological alternative to religious grounds for belief in survival.

The Myth of Enlightenment

Are you seeking enlightenment? What I’m about to say may be surprising: give up this search for enlightenment.  Everyone seeking “enlightenment” ensures only one result, the continuation of his or her own unhappiness.  Your fundamental interest is best served by simply dumping this search for enlightenment into the nearest trashcan.

In the present essay, I would like to deconstruct or demythologize “enlightenment” and explain the central insight of Non-Duality within many of the Hindu and Buddhist traditions.  This central insight may be concisely stated as follows: you are already awake, and nothing can make you more awake than you already are. As something not already in your possession, not already your present reality, and therefore as something you aim to attain, enlightenment is a myth, indeed a delusion. The search for enlightenment is self-defeating in this way, for the reality you are seeking can never become your present reality because it already is your present reality.  As Zen Buddhist Sekkei Harada has said, “If you make a separation between yourself and what you are looking for, no matter how much effort you make to lessen that distance, that effort will be in vain.”

I.  The Enlightenment-Seeking Game 

Humans have something of a shared project: the search for completion, satisfaction, or fulfillment.  In the material sphere of existence, we seek completion through money, fame, physical possessions of various sorts, drugs, and—if we’re more “evolved”—the right kind of relationship with another person (e.g., friendship, lover, partner). Many people realize at some point, though, that none of these objects or relationships really brings a genuine or lasting completion or fulfillment.  Once we’ve run through multiple unsatisfying relationships or career paths, we may find ourselves, like many others, moving on and seeking completion in an ostensibly transcendent or spiritual object or relationship.  By way of meditation, prayer, or some other spiritual practice, one seeks spiritual awakening or a personal connection with God.  Those lucky enough to find it, inevitably lose it and spend the rest of their lives trying to find it again.

Why?

The search for completion, whether undertaken in the material or spiritual spheres of human experience, is actually one and the same.  It’s the search to be someone or something, to have an identity, and it’s rooted in our shared sense of incompletion and lack of satisfaction.  At the root of the search for enlightenment is the same feeling and belief at the root of the search for completion in the material sphere of existence, namely the feeling of separateness and the belief that I am a separate self and therefore lacking a connection or oneness with others and the world. From this notion of being a separate self arises all suffering or lack of satisfaction.  As long as searching is present, lack of satisfaction is present.  As Francis Lucille has aptly noted, “unhappiness is the search for happiness.”  What must ultimately be uprooted is not the object of the search, but the very search itself.  The reason why our search for enlightenment fails is not because we haven’t found the right object.  It fails because we think there is an object, something outside ourselves and something not already present, that will bring the satisfaction we wish to attain. 

II.  The Dualistic Presuppositions of Enlightenment-Seeking

To hear that the search for enlightenment is misguided is initially confusing to most people.  This is probably because the eastern spiritual traditions are often portrayed as proposing paths that allegedly lead to enlightenment.  Enlightenment is the spiritual equivalent of baking a cake: just follow the recipe, and there are lots of recipes out there for enlightenment. So, for example, by practicing meditation a person is supposed to achieve enlightenment, or by engaging in devotion to a particular god (e.g., Shiva or Krishna) a person is supposed to experience God.  After all, wasn’t the “Buddha” (i.e., the “awakened one”) born only when Siddhartha Gautama achieved special insight while sitting under the Bodhi tree after many years of meditation and rigorous spiritual practice? Didn’t the various Christian saints experience God only after their devotional practice was sufficiently elevated? 

The assumption in this common account of enlightenment is that we move from lacking something (e.g., knowledge, wisdom, enlightenment, connection with God) to possessing it. Our natural condition, or at least starting point, is that of ignorance: ignorance about the true nature of the world and the self.  By following a particular path or spiritual practice this condition of ignorance is supposed to dissolve.  One achieves a new condition of awakening or enlightenment.  There is practice, and there is the goal to which it leads. Practice and goal are two separate things, and the goal is achieved as the effect of the practice as cause.

This common understanding of enlightenment and its conditions is misleading at best, and in at least one sense simply false.  So I call it the “myth of enlightenment.” 

The common understanding rests on the false assumption that there is actually a separation between things, for example, between some goal and the means that leads to it, or a separation between the place you’re in at present and where you should be in order to be “OK.”  Most fundamentally, it assumes a separation between what you are and that which you wish to attain.  The eastern traditions use the word “samsara” to refer to the cycle of death and rebirth, a cycle fueled by our attachments to sense objects (e.g., things, people, relationships).  In samsara there is suffering, as our attachments never bring us lasting satisfaction. Samsara is often contrasted with moksha (liberation from the suffering intrinsic to samsara) or nirvana (cessation of the suffering intrinsic to samsara).  The common understanding of enlightenment suggests a separation between samsara and moksha/nirvana.

The common understanding engenders questions like, where is Nirvana located? What kind of existence is Nirvana?  Do we need to die to get there?  Similarly, it leads seekers to suppose that enlightenment is some exotic experience, some altered state of consciousness.  After all, if enlightenment is a realm outside of ordinary experience, it must at the very least involve a radically altered state of consciousness.  So people end up ingesting some hallucinogenic drug and spending four hours looking at smashed cherries on the sidewalk in the hope of seeing the face of God. 

III.  The Non-Dual Understanding of Enlightenment 

In the non-dual spiritual traditions (for example, in Zen Buddhism and Hindu Advaita Vedanta), the forms of separation or duality suggested by the common understanding of enlightenment are considered false, or at any rate they cannot be the ultimate truth. Therefore, non-dual traditions have a very different understanding of enlightenment and its relation to spiritual practice and our present condition. 

Three famous non-dual teachers illustrate the fundamental point.

Second-century Indian philosopher Nagarjuna wrote: 

Nothing of saṁsāra is different from nirvāṇa, nothing of nirvāṇa is different from saṁsāra. That which is the limit of nirvāṇa is also the limit of saṁsāra; there is not the slightest difference between the two.

Zen master Dogen said: 

You should understand that birth-and-death is itself nirvana. Nirvana is not realized outside of birth-and-death. . . . Between aspiration, practice, enlightenment, and nirvana, there is not a moment’s gap. . . .It’s not that there is no practice and no enlightenment. It’s just that it’s not possible to divide them.

Ramana Maharshi taught: 

The state of Self-realization, as we call it, is not attaining something new or reaching some goal which is far away, but simply being that which you always are and which you always have been.

It is false to speak of realization. What is there to realize? The real is as it is always. We are not creating anything new or achieving something which we did not have before. . . . Liberation is our very nature.  We are that! 

There is no goal to be reached. There is nothing to be attained.  You are the Self.  You exist always. Nothing more can be predicated of the Self than that it exists.  Seeing God or the Self is only being the Self or yourself.  Seeing is being.

So where is nirvana? Answer: it’s nowhere; indeed, it’s nothing other than life as it is already present to you.  What kind of experience is it? Answer: it isn’t an experience at all. It’s what is present in all experience, namely the awareness or consciousness at the root of every thought, feeling, and sensation, or what is often called the witnessing background of experience.  As Maharshi repeatedly said, nothing is more evident to us than I am, not I am “this” or “that,” but simply I am, simple consciousness, or the abiding presence of awareness. 

According to the logic of Non-Duality, there can be no ultimate separation between practice and enlightenment because reality as such is non-dual.  Since the mind operates according to dualistic categories, the mind’s grasp of reality is always by means of conceptual and categorical overlay.  We cannot say that the mind is grasping things as they truly are. Consequently, practice and enlightenment become two things by way of mental engagement with reality as it is.  Similarly, no one can achieve enlightenment or awakening because that which is (inadequately) signified by the term “awakening” is already the present reality, indeed the only reality there is.

In considering your alleged “awakening,” simply ask yourself “who is there to be awakened”?  Not your true Self, for your true Self is already awake, just as the sun is already shining and inseparable from its light.  The mind cannot be awakened, for to become awake is to see and be all things as they truly are, as ultimately one.  This is beyond the mind, which can only approach it by speculative and theoretical reconstruction, as an object of inquiry.  A character in a film may intellectually entertain the possibility of being made out of the screen, but he cannot experientially know it. Similarly, the mind cannot know the substratum of pure awareness out of which it is made. 

What is often obscured in this exploration is the distinction between the fact of our essential nature and the mind’s encounter with it or approach to it.  Our essential nature is clear seeing or simple awareness.  More completely stated, it’s the union of being and knowing, and peace is intrinsic to it.  For this reason, in Vedanta the Self is called satchitananda (being-consciousness-bliss). Hence, peace is already the present reality.  However, having judged this reality not to be present, the mind embarks upon the search for it.  Of course, it will not find it for the very reason that it initially judges it absent.  The present reality eludes the grasp of the mind because reality is non-dual, but the mind operates on a dualistic schema, which filters and alters the present reality, dividing it into subject-object and thereby separating being and knowing.  Hence, the peace intrinsic to our very Self is not graspable by the mind. At best, it’s obscurely reflected in the mind it in a filtered, limited form.

A frequently used analogy to illustrate the relationship between the mind and our essential nature as abiding peaceful awareness is that of a dusty mirror that reflects rays of light from the sun.  The mirror can only inadequately approximate the reality of the sun by reflecting its light along the surface of its limited, dusty contours.  Neither the mirror nor the light it reflects is the sun itself. It’s the sun altered or modified in the form light from the mirror.  Similarly, the effects of our essential nature may arise in the mind, veiled and altered under name and form.  In this way, “awareness” – I am – takes the form of a particular I-thought (I am a man, I am a student), I-feeling (I am tired, I am sad), or I-sensation (I am appeared to redly, I am appeared to mountainly).  The latter are all limited names and forms of unlimited awareness.  At best they dimly reflect our essential nature. 

Rupert Spira has nicely summarized enlightenment from the non-dual viewpoint.

Real enlightenment is not an exotic experience.  It’s the natural condition of all experience.  It’s the most familiar thing we know: just the knowing of our own being as it is, and it shines at the heart of all experience. 

IV. Re-Conceptualizing the Enlightenment Experience

What then is the alleged experience of enlightenment?  After all, many people have claimed such an experience.  Two possibilities present themselves that are consistent with non-duality. 

First, they may be referring to the mind’s reflection of the reality that is already present as their essential Self.  Here there is no becoming enlightened.  The mind is always reflecting this present reality, for it is not an experience but the witnessing background of all experience.  What is always present is awareness, I am or I am present.  At the most we can say that something is noticed, in much the same way that we may suddenly notice the screen on the television we’ve been watching for an hour. We’ve been looking at the screen all along as we watch the movie.  But our attention shifts to the screen as that out of which the movie is made.  Periodically there is a blissful experience or some other apparent shift in awareness.  The thing to understand here is that the particular experience is an effect of the deeper reality; it is not that reality itself.  Those who are seeking a particular experience will invariably miss their essential nature.

Alternatively, what is called “enlightenment” may also be conceptualized not as an event in the mind or ego (even as the effect of our essential Self), but as what is left when the separate self or mind has dissolved. This preserves non-duality in a more coherent manner.  When there is a noticing of abiding awareness, it’s the same noticing that is happening all along, except that the hindrance, the mind, has been removed.  The mind does not apprehend the Self, neither directly nor indirectly.  It is knowing that knows, and knowing immediately and infallibly knows itself.  And this knowing is simply non-different from being the Self each person essentially is, in much the same way that the sun’s being just is the sun’s illumination. 

We can, of course, interpret spiritual practice in either of these two ways, as either a polishing of the mirror or as a shattering of the mirror.  But consider practice from the latter viewpoint.  Ramana Maharshi, in recommending the method of self-inquiry, asked his students to trace the I-thought back to its source, which is the Self or Essential I of pure awareness.  In this process, of course, the mind never gets to the source.  It dissolves upon approach, like rays of light reflected off a mirror back into the sun from which they originated. As Maharshi said, “When the ‘I’ is divested of the ‘I’ only the ‘I’ remains.”  So it’s not that the mind achieves insight, either directly or indirectly.  The mind simply ceases to exist.  It’s not that practice polishes the mirror.  Practice breaks the mirror altogether, which is why the understanding that is present in clear seeing is non-different from our very being. Better yet, practice is the celebration of realization as our essential nature. 

Hence, Maharshi says: 

You are awareness. Awareness is another name for you. Since you are awareness there is no need to attain or cultivate it. All that you have to do is to give up being aware of other things, that is of the not-Self. If one gives up being aware of them then pure awareness alone remains, and that is the Self.

V.  A Non-Dual Orientation Towards Practice

We can still speak of enlightenment or awakening, though paradoxically there is no one there to be enlightened or awakened.  At the most, we can say there is awakening.  Indeed, there was awakening, there is awakening, and there will always be awakening. There is also no need to deny practice.  What is essential is the attitude towards it.  Any orientation towards practice that loses sight of the abiding presence of awareness loses sight of practice itself, for practice is itself an expression of the awakening that is the Self.

Paradoxically, the best practice for a person will be whatever practice helps relax and dissolve the effort to find enlightenment.  It can be playing the guitar, basketball, writing in a journal, sitting by the ocean, reading a book, petting a cat, making love, eating chocolate, painting a wall, or sitting in a Zendo with your face to the wall.  All these activities can be forms and expressions of meditation, if by this we understand what Krishnamurti said: “in meditation every form of search must come to an end.”  What is crucial is being present, and you are utterly present whenever your activity is undertaken for no reason other than the pure love of doing it. Here you see that meditation is what you are, and it’s merely revealed in the practice.  For this reason, Jeff Foster says, “the end of all seeking is life as it is.”  Here there is clear seeing, of dogs, people, trees, rivers, butterflies, birth, pain, and death.

Of course, life “as it is” is already underway and totally present.  Oneness is not something separate from what is already happening around you and within you.  And you are already seeing life as it is.  Indeed, you are that life!  Therefore, in your essential nature you are already awake, and nothing can make you more awake than you already are. 

Michael Sudduth

Chocolate Nirvana

The Sesshin at Jikoji Zen Meditation Retreat Center ended on Sunday July 6, 2014 with my first bite of chocolate in two years.

For those unfamiliar with sesshin, it’s a multi-day period of intensive Zen meditation. We just completed a three-day sesshin at Jikoji. For various reasons, my participation in the sesshin was less than I had anticipated, but something very profound happened at the end.  You might call it enlightenment, satori, or nirvana, or – what amounts to the same – life as it is.  I ended my nearly two-year abandonment of processed sugar and ate a large piece of chocolate.  While this may seem insignificant to many people, it was a profoundly beautiful event I experienced in utter solitude. 

Background. I had a very dear friend visiting me here at Jikoji for a few days. While roaming unseasonably frigid beaches in Santa Cruz, we had some wonderful discussions about our evolving spiritual practices and individual life journeys.  Among our “lighter” topics of discussion was food, and in connection with that what “sweet” thing I should choose to temporarily suspend my now nearly two-year abandonment of processed sugar.  I had decided that it should be extremely expensive, something like a $30 chocolate eclair at a fancy restaurant, consumed with an expensive bottle of wine and the company of close friends, somewhat reminiscent of Socrates being joined with close friends as he drank the hemlock and passed into the world of the gods.

However, on Sunday as I walked into the resident kitchen at Jikoji, in a moment’s realization my former intention struck me as utterly absurd.  It was then that my eyes fell upon a huge block of dark, bitter-sweet chocolate with almonds, sitting on the kitchen table.  I walked up to it, broke off a large chunk, and without a second thought ate it all by myself. I drank it down with a cup of earl grey tea . . . hot. 

I have a feeling I will later look upon this experience and realize that I was “enlightened” at the moment the chocolate entered my mouth. maybe before, or maybe after.  For now, I simply see the experience as one in which I let the river carry me to the ocean.  Perhaps as the chocolate dissolved in my mouth, I too dissolved into a timeless present in which clinging and aversion had temporarily disappeared.

Do I now become a sugar addict again?  Only time will tell.  However, self understanding, which is the only final virtue in life, is worth the risk.  As philosopher Harry Callahan aptly noted, “a good man always knows his limitations.”  Yet sometimes we only discover our real limits but pressing hard against the false boundaries we have erected in our lives. Right now, I’m largely about saying “fuck you” to limits grounded in delusions created by aversion and my former co-dependent relationship with my ex fiancée.

The bite of chocolate is in a sense nirvana: the cessation of a subtle form of suffering, which can only be rooted out and dissolved one bite at a time.  True freedom lies in the ability to say “yes” to whatever places you on the fine line between utter destruction and complete fulfillment. Anything short of this is a life half lived, and any such life is hardly lived at all. 

Michael Sudduth

Nisargadatta on Wisdom and Love

Nisargadatta Maharaj (1897-1981)

“When I see I am nothing, that is wisdom. When I see I am everything, that is love. My life is a movement between these two.” – Nisargadatta 

Nisargadatta here summarizes one of the central insights articulated in the Upanishads.  He speaks of wisdom or knowledge associated with a negative realization, the realization of what one is not. He also speaks of love associated with the positive realization of what one is. He speaks of his life as a movement between each, for life may be lived in such a way that the wisdom gained by understanding what we are not gives rise to the loving understanding of what we are. Having divested ourselves of the understanding that we are the limited mind, body, or mind-body, we are situated to see that we are a vaster Self present and experienced in all things.

 

The Path of Exclusion

“To see that one is nothing” doesn’t mean “to see oneself as non-existent.” It’s rather to see one’s no-thingness, seeing that essentially we are not the limited being we believe ourselves to be.  More specifically, it’s to see that the real self is not the mind-body or any of its many manifestations or roles: man, woman, son, father, mother, student, professor, lawyer, American, Californian, Democrat, Republican, Christian, Jew, Hindu, Buddhist, etc.  I am not what is thought in thinking.  I am not what is perceived in perceiving.  I am not what is sensed in sensing. I am not the body, which appears as the object of my thinking, perceiving, and sensing.  To see that one is no-thing is to dissolve the sense of self that is rooted in attachments to the non-enduring objects of sense experience.  This “path of exclusion” involves a dismantling of a false conception of the self that has arisen from identification with the body-mind.  The Upanishads directs us to this understanding of our essential nature by the phrase neti neti (not this, not that), that is, “I am not this thing” and “I am not that thing.”

Then what?

When the subject is divested of an identity forged in relation to an ostensibly independently existing world of outer objects, the true subject itself is revealed or realized.  I am not my thinking, perceiving, or sensing. I am that which is aware of them. The only enduring feature of experience is the atman, pure awareness, the ever-present, witnessing background of all experience. This is the “I” that remains once the I (of the false ego) is dissolved. In this way, the path of exclusion brings one to the knowledge of the true, enduring Self.

The Path of Inclusion

However, what is given in the knowledge that one is pure awareness is not the knowledge of the nature of this pure awareness. This remains to be explored as a second movement after the path of exclusion. We can speak of it as a “path of inclusion.” Here the Self, initially distinguished from the world, returns to the world and ultimately sees all things as manifestations of the Self.  The return to the world of objects commences with the exploration of our experience.  It is to ask, what is known in the thinking? What is known in the perceiving? What is known in the sensing? It is to see, after careful engagement, that there is nothing in the experience other than the knowing of it.  In the perception of the tree, there is nothing but the knowing of it. In the sensation of heat, there is nothing but the knowing of it. In the thought of one’s name, there is nothing but the knowing of it. Experience itself is made of nothing but the knowing of it.

“To see that one is everything” is just to see that everything is made out of the awareness that is oneself.  However, never coming to be nor ceasing to be, this awareness is ever-present, without origin, and eternal. Having no boundaries, it is boundless. Having no limit, it is limitless or infinite. The Self does not partake of the destiny of either the body or the mind, but is witness to their birth and witness to their ultimate dissolution.

The Path of Love

This path of inclusion may be understood as “the path of love,” and from this love all compassion freely flows.

First, from the viewpoint of the Upanishads, the heart of all suffering is resistance, and resistance arises from subject-object duality. I can only experience resistance if there is the perception of some thing other than myself.  There can be no resistance in non-duality. Thus non-duality is peace, completeness, satisfaction, or the absence of wanting or needing. Otherwise put, suffering arises from resistance born of the separation between the knower and what is known (being).  Ananda (bliss or love) may therefore be understood as the union or non-separateness of knowing and being.

Second, love is the outflowing of one’s being that produces the infinite variety of the objects of experience. They are so many manifestations of the love that is oneself.  But love is also the inflowing of one’s being back into awareness, for in the realization that “the object” is really a form of the “subject,” the object as a mere object dissolves. Love, divested of its object, falls back into the Self from which it originated. Hence, as the Upanishads state, all things arise from love, evolve through love, and dissolve into love.  You are that love, the fountain of compassion guided by wisdom.

Michael Sudduth

Zen Thoughts

During the past few weeks, I have posted thoughts at the intersection of Zen and Advaita Vedanta.  Here I offer the first of several blogs that I will simply call “Zen Thoughts,” though much of what I have to say reflects the non-dual tradition of Advaita Vedanta.

I begin with three quotes from Zen master Dogen.

“Between aspiration, practice, enlightenment, and nirvana, there is not a moment’s gap.”

“Great enlightenment is the tea and rice of everyday living.”

“Beyond enlightenment is the jewel concealed in your hair.”

In the first statement Dogen affirms the non-separateness of the Path and the Goal.  In the second he tells us that what we are looking for in the way of spiritual attainment (Path and Goal) is our present reality.  In the third he makes the same point, with the suggestion that we need to “get over” enlightenment as a goal.

Below I explore Dogen’s wisdom.  The first section is a series of statements about enlightenment as our present reality, the mental conditions under which this present reality is obscured, and human suffering.  The second section is a series of statements about zazen, so-called “Zen meditation.” 

I offer these thoughts not simply from an intellectual standpoint but as children born from me through zazen practice during the past few months.  Ultimately, of course, Zen insight cannot be adequately captured through thoughts or words. You must deeply dive into your experience.

Enlightenment as the Veiled Present Reality

1. The greatest challenge in the search for enlightenment is finding the path that leads to it, and the greatest challenge in the search for the path to enlightenment is realizing where you are at present.  The path you are seeking is actually where you are in your present condition, and the light you hope to find at the journey’s end is already your present reality.  It is shining as your essential Self.

2. The mind veils the Dharma (truth), so it is not seen as your present reality.  The mind veils the Path, so it is not seen as the ground where you are already standing and upon which you already walk.  The mind veils the Self, so that it’s seen to be different from the Dharma and the Path.

3. What is the veil?  The veil is the belief and subsequent feeling that I am this self, this person, that what I essentially am shares in the limits and destiny of the mind-body.  Being this self, I am separate from other things.  Being separate from other things, aversion and clinging to them arises.  In short, the veil is the mind’s story. The central character is the “I-thought” and the plot is the search for enlightenment, intermittently suspended by brief moments of peace in an on-going cycle of clinging and aversion.

4. Ramana Maharshi said, “When the I is divested of the I, only the I remains.”  Here the Big Mind of Zen meets the Abiding Awareness of Vedanta.  Enlightenment, therefore, may be described as a subtraction:  the falling away of the small mind, the dismantling of the false ego, the dissolution of what we take ourselves to be.

5a. The present reality is the perception of the butterfly landing on a leaf, the sound of a passing car, the taste of cashew butter, the smell of oranges, the softness of the cat’s fur as your hand glides upon its back – all an expression or manifestation of life as it is, without judgment, without reaction.  You are that.

5b. The present reality is the perception of the lifeless body of a bird, the screeching sound of nails upon a chalk board, the sourness of a lemon, the smell of rotting meat, and the prick of a thorn that penetrates your skin – all an expression or manifestation of life as it is, without judgment, without reaction. You are that.

5c. The present reality is your struggle, your depression, your anxiety, your sadness, your pain, your suffering.  It’s the impermanence of things; indeed, it’s the no-thingness of things.  You are that.

6. The greatest obstacle in the search for enlightenment is searching for enlightenment, because in this search you might miss the chair sitting in your room.

7.  Don’t worry about enlightenment. It will find you, and there’s utterly nothing you can do to prevent it.  You may be taking a shower, drinking tea, or brushing your teeth.  You may be reading a novel, conversing with a friend, or watching a cat walk along a fence.  You may be laughing, crying, or sleeping.  Enlightenment will find you.

8.  Enlightenment is like breathing.  It’s present and happening all the time but just not noticed.

9. I like this “pleasant” experience. Attachment to it arises. Suffering is invited. I dislike this “unpleasant” experience.  Aversion to it arises.  Suffering is experienced.

10. Unhappiness is nothing less and nothing more than the search for happiness, but the substance of all unhappiness is the very enduring peace we wish we had instead.

Sunset at Jikoji Ridge

On Zazen (“Zen Meditation”)

1.  Zazen is the path. Zazen is the goal.  Zazen is the goalless path. All true. Like enlightenment, zazen is ungraspable because it grasps us.  If you are reaching for it, it has already reached you.  This is your present condition.

2. Having taken the noble posture in zazen, simply sit with whatever thoughts, feelings, or sensations arise in the mind-body.  Simply “watch” the inner movie, with neither clinging nor aversion to the characters or storyline.  Just observe, without judgment, without commentary.   If judgment or commentary arises, be the watcher of these too.

3. In zazen there is no attempt to change or control the mind, no attempt to rigidly fix the attention on some thought, feeling, or sensation.  In fact, there is no attempt to grasp after or get anything, even from the practice itself. There is, therefore, space for all thoughts, feelings, and sensations.  In this way, life as it is may be clearly seen and seen as one’s present reality.  Zazen is simply the direct or immediate encounter with life as it is.

4. Having freed attention from this or that thought, image, or mantra, we are left only to face the self, to trace the “I-thought” to its origin.

5.  If you close your eyes, you easily fall into your thoughts, feelings, and sensations. Open your eyes and always come back to your breath to remain on the “outside” of thoughts, feelings, and sensations.  Always observing.  Know that when judgment is present (“I like this” or “I dislike that”), the mind is speaking.  The witness or observer is awareness.

6. Welcome the unpleasant feeling or thought as much as the pleasant, for they are equally your inner guides. Do not dictate the duration of their stay.  As they spontaneously arise in you, so also they will dissolve of their own accord.

7.  It’s not possible to sit quietly for an extended period of time and not begin the process of peeling away the defenses the mind has created to keep you from life as it is.  This is why few people like to sit still for more than a few moments.  The mind knows the conditions of its own demise.

8a.  Zazen is unconscious work being done on conscious life.  Zazen is conscious work being done on unconscious life.  This is why five minutes in zazen is better than no time in zazen.  What we may describe as “shitty zazen” is zazen nonetheless and on that account entirely efficacious, whether we know it or not.

8b.  If you practice zazen, you may have an experience you call “enlightenment,” or you may not have such an experience. It’s also possible that you will experience enlightenment and simply not know it.

9. The effects of zazen are compassion and wisdom, extended towards oneself and all sentient beings.  Softness guided by insight is a precious jewel.

10.  If you have ever done the dishes, made a bed, or taken out the garbage, you have experienced the whole reality contained in zazen but so cleverly veiled by the small mind.

11. Zazen is a universal “yes.” It is a “yes” to everything, the pleasant and the unpleasant, self and no-self, truth and falsehood, suffering and peace.  This universality, this meeting of every aspect of life, is symbolized in the mudra, the oval-shaped positioning of the hands in zazen. And having experienced this “yes” while sitting, experience it while standing, walking, and working.  Let every action be a “yes” to the world.  In this way, let every action originate from the center.  This center is the vitality of utter presence in your action.  Zazen in silence and zazen in activity is each zazen, each the vehicle of Dharma transmission.

12.  There are many ways of describing Zazen:  the study of the self, the dissolution of the small mind, the peace of being, oneness, life as it is, and so forth.  These words underscore the basic interest of Zen:  finding satisfaction in every moment of life, even the unhappy ones.  However, it’s important to get beyond words.  Only in zazen, whether in silence or activity, is the Dharma directly experienced.

13. It seems paradoxical to offer thoughts on what cannot be grasped by thought, but the whole point of the exercise is to collapse or dissolve the mind to make room for a special kind of understanding.  This understanding is, in the words of the famous Zen koan, “your face before your parents were born.”

 

Michael Sudduth